Keep Believing Even When Your Prayers Hit The Ceiling
My Faith Had Lost All Meaning
Keep believing even in the moments you feel you don’t have an ounce of belief in you. I remember when I felt my prayers had hit the ceiling. The night my husband was taken to the hospital, I fell to my knees at his bedside in the emergency room. I prayed with conviction and authority in my heart, that god would heal him. Although, he came back to us, he was not going to get better. My prayers were not answered and that was something that I could not understand. I had become something I never imagined or thought up for myself, I became a widow. During that time, I lived in a fog and complete haze. Loss and the aftermath it presents is something that you can not explain or help people to understand. Unless a person has experienced loss for themselves, it is hard for others to comprehend. I saw the unanswered prayers as god failing me, life failing me. Because of that, I lost confidence in my faith and I stopped praying and believing.
You Kept Me Believing
I’m thankful that God and my family kept me believing. I came back to my faith and as I did, he started revealing to me the plans he had ahead. I’m blessed that I can stop and look back at my life, even the struggles, and see the joy that has been restored. Through my journey of loss, I have become to know myself. I am confident in who I am, although I am still growing into the person I hope to be. I am blessed to have leaned into life and to have designed the life I want for myself. My design continues to change, but I think that is completely normal for people who open themselves up to growing. I sometimes fear for what pain may be ahead, but I think that will always be present, because loss changes perception of life. Challenge yourselves to look to today and have a grateful heart for moments and breaths.
There is a song that goes with this. Music has been such a big part of my journey.
Tanya Smith is a remarried widow, mom, business woman, blogger, and widow advocate. In 2016 Tanya started the A Widows World blog where she shares her eleven year perspective and experience in widowhood.
At the age of 26, Tanya became a young widow. For a time, motion was at a standstill, but it came back in full force and gave her so much clarity and tenacity to take on things, to live life with no bounds. This tenacity has opened many doors, inspired new adventures, and forced her out of her comfort zone. She has a heart to serve and her message is one of hope through the dark and devastation.
Tanya has been featured as a Woman of Strength in Glancer Magazine, a Chicagoland publication, and has been a guest speaker on several podcasts and live radio shows such as the LifeBeats Project Podcast series, Feeling Fabulous Podcast, 108 Praise Radio and more – sharing her story and how to get to a place where you can see the beauty in your brokenness.
Recent Feeling Fabulous Podcast - http://www.feelingfabulouspodcast.com/entrepreneur/17-interview-with-tanya-smith/
Episode – Getting comfortable with the uncomfortable and beginning again after loss to find the beauty in the broken spaces of your life | with Tanya Smith of A Widow’s World (TLBP #64) https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/lifebeats-project-briana-johnson/id1088514723?mt=2.
Tanya Smith, is also the President of Addelise Inc. a Marketing and Branding company. She is an experienced business executive with over 10+ years of focused business development, brand development, marketing, sales strategies, corporate event planning and social media development. Tanya, has successfully implemented sales and marketing strategies for major corporations and has effectively increased revenue by 50% for a multi-million dollar firm in her professional career. Tanya, is an entrepreneur; mother, remarried widow, lover of life and helping others achieve their dreams.
It has been on her heart to find a very accepting Widows Community where she can call home. She is proud and humbled to be a part of the Hope for Widows Foundation Board of Directors and sisterhood, growing, reaching and fostering connection and inspiration – so that no widow feels left behind.